Darqstar (darqstar) wrote,
Darqstar
darqstar

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I have come to the conclusion...

...that the root of all evil is Jell-o. Orange in particular, but all flavors are guilty as well of being evil. The nine levels of Hell all have their own particular flavor. The lesser levels cover cherry and strawberry. The one just before orange is lemon, before that is lime. And so on and so forth.

Yes, I know Bill Cosby a decidedly unevil man was the spokesperson for all things Jell-o for a number of years, but that was just to lull the world into a false sense of security, so that the evil that is Jell-o could spread unhampered. Besides, Bill spoke more about Jell-o pudding, rather than Jell-o, Jell-o, which is the true evil. The pudding is just fine.

Mark my words, the day is coming when the devil shall return to earth to take over. And he'll be snacking on a large bowl of orange Jell-o. You wait. You'll see it and then you'll say to yourselves, "Holy crap, Darq was right! Too bad when she told us, we just thought she was batshit insane." But by then it will be too late.

I, on the other hand will be safely hidden in my Jell-o free zone.

I would not be at all surprised to discover that George Bush adores Jell-o. Really.
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