Darqstar (darqstar) wrote,
Darqstar
darqstar

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I am going to visit my folks tomorrow. They have oranges for me. My mother has not seen my hair since I cut it. She will be thrilled. She loves it when I have short hair for some reason I have not figured out.

At least she finally admits that I don't look too bad with black hair. But, she still prefers red. To be honest, I will be glad when I finally have red hair again. I've enjoyed having black hair, but eh, enough is enough.

I have an overwhelming craving for Dole jarred peaches. Not the canned peaches, the ones in the jar. I have always loved peaches, but I dislike the fuzzy coatings. And these are the best "not fresh" peaches I've ever eaten. I do have a bottle of peach watersoda from WalMart, but it's not helping the craving, it's making it worse.

Todd is starting to get both nervous and anxious about his impending surgery. I think he's at the point where he just doesn't care anymore, as long as it will help.

I've been feeling fat lately. Yeah, I am fat, but I'm losing weight, and I still feel fat. It probably didn't help that I weighed myself the other day and I've only lost three pounds in three weeks. Yeah, last month I only lost four pounds, but I was hoping that was just a lull. I guess I'm tapering off to a pound a week. I shouldn't be too disappointed, but there are times when I just get so discouraged.

I'm still walking though. Last week was a bad week, cause Sunday I decided to take the day off, figuring I'd make it up durring the week, but Thursday, I could not do more than 2.50 miles. I was wondering if I was coming down with something, but I think it was more because I hadn't slept too well two nights before. But Tuesday, I put in eleven miles, tromping through my city, then tromping into the neighboring town and all around that place. I had to split it into two walks, but still... eleven miles. And most of it on very hilly terrain.

I did only do Curves three times this week, but all three times I tried to give it my all. I'm not sure if I suceeded Friday as well. My hair wasn't as soaked as it usually is. Then again, it was also snowing out and rather cold, and inside it didn't seem as hot. (They have some serious trouble with the heat in the strip mall they are located in, and sometimes this winter, it's been like an oven in there.) But, my arms and legs and shoulders were pretty sore when I left. Of course, I also stunk up the place with the reek of fish and chips, but I already wrote about that.

I just wish I could see and feel the results better than I am. I know I'm thinner. Those 36" waist pants I finally broke down and bought are getting large on me. The 38" pants I owned from before are really too big on me. Like too big meaning if I wear them, I have to kinda do the one hand yank up. Now the 36" pants are at the point where I can take them on and off without unbuttoning or unzipping them. I have bought bras that are a size smaller and they don't feel tight anymore. So, I darned well know I am smaller.

But, I look in the mirror and I still say, "Yikes, there is still an awful lot of me!" I compare pictures of me in October and me now, and I don't see any difference.

Yes, I know this is a journey I'm undertaking, that it's not a case of "And one morning I'll wake up and be THIN!" It's a journey... not a miracle and hopefully, by the time the journey is over, not only will I be thinner, but I will know what to do to keep myself thinner. I hope that this walking habbit I've picked up is one I will continue for the rest of my life. I have to admit, I wouldn't mind being able to cut down the walking a bit, but I still can see myself going on marathon hikes through the city, into the next town, like some stalker of real estate, cause I'm madly in love with some of the houses and mills around here.

I should get some sleep. As started this post with, I am going to my folks tomorrow. So, I should attempt to wake up early so I can either go for a walk or do my "dance walk" thing before I go up to my folks. Otherwise I'm going to end up taking this Sunday off too. If I keep doing this, I'll never get a good record for this month. *g* Might make the weekly goals, but I won't go beyond them.

Goten is sleeping on my bed. He's got his head on my pillow and he looks so sweet, cute, and innocent. He looks so peaceful, he must be having a wonderful dream. Probably about my untimely death at his hands.

I know when I lay down and get comfortable, Chrissy will come in and then cry and cry like the little bitch she is, because she wants to sleep with me, but she won't get on the bed if Goten is there. The usual compromise is that I try to fall asleep in the center of the bed, on my side, so I can have one on either side of me. I guess I'm the magical "Mommy wall" that makes one bed into two beds.

Sleep well everyone.
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