Seeing that it was a great excuse for me not to cook, we decided to use th coupon tonight. Also, I got another certificate that said I could get three dollars off my next meal. Neither said they couldn't be used with any other offer, so we happily set off for Applebee's.
Our extreme cheapness is not the point of this tale, trust me.
So, we go to Applebee's and I have a garlic shrimp salad for dinner. Because I love shrimp and I love salad. But, sadly, the salad is dry, dry, dry.
So, I ask the nice waitress if I can have an extra side of dressing. She merrily runs off to fufill my request, because she's a very perky woman and perky women always rush around, it seems.
She returns, holding a small cup of ceasar dressing. Just before she gets to me, she stumbles, the cup flies, spattering me with ceasar dressing, as well as the table, the chair, the floor around me, my shoes, etc.
Poor waitress is mortified and starts apologizing a blue streak.
Husband, who I might remind you, promised to love, honor, and cherish me till death do us part, almost 12 years ago... (In fact, on the 26th of this month, it willl be exactly 12 years...) looks at me.
I wait patiently, knowing he will say something warm, and loving, and wonderful, that will make me feel so much better about being splattered with salad dressing. Because he's so good at cheering me up and making me feel good in any situation.
He grins and announces, "You look like you were in a really good porno flick!"
The sad part? He was absolutely right.